


Tiny Hands and Wedding Bands

by hygge



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Marriage, Newborn Children, Parenthood, Phanfiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-11
Updated: 2017-08-11
Packaged: 2018-12-13 21:51:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11769102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hygge/pseuds/hygge
Summary: Dan and Phil are keeping quite a big, and also quite a small, secret from the world.





	Tiny Hands and Wedding Bands

This was it. 

This was the day they had been waiting for for nine months. No, more than that. Years. They had been waiting for this ever since the topic of having kids came up in conversation almost four years ago— before they honeymooned in Japan, before they got married, before the thought of marriage had even occurred to them. At first, the discussion was only about whether or not the other wanted kids, and if so, how many. It didn’t take long before they were talking about whether they would prefer to adopt or find a surrogate and what they would name their children. During those conversations, these possibilities felt so far away it seemed as if they were planning for something that wouldn’t happen in their lifetime.

But now, it was time. 

Dan had gotten the call from their surrogate, Laura, to tell them she was in active labor and was on her way to the hospital. Initially, Dan freaked out and ran to grab Phil so they could rush over there as well, until Laura laughed and told him it would probably still be a couple hours before there was any major progress. She told them to take their time and to make sure they brought everything with them. Dan calmed down slightly and told her they’d be on their way soon.

They had been preparing for the birth of their son for months now. They had purchased clothes, new furniture, anything and everything they could possibly need. They asked for constant advice from both of their parents and friends. They bought numerous books on parenting and caring for a newborn. The biggest thing, though, was that they had to move. 

While the constant drilling, cracked walls, and gas leaks annoyed them, the old apartment simply wasn’t big enough for the three of them. It was difficult to leave the old place, since five years of memories were created there, but they ended up finding a new place only a couple of miles from where they were before. It a semi detached home, white with black trim, with four bedrooms, two bathrooms, a spacious kitchen, and two separate living areas. The best part, though, was the fact that it had a garden. A pretty large garden, at that. It seemed like the perfect place to start a family.

Once he hung up after his conversation with their surrogate, Dan ran downstairs towards the gaming room in search of Phil. This was not the time for being calm. This was the time for excitement and celebration.

Phil was sitting at the desk editing a video that he had filmed the day before. Dan walked into the room and leaned against the desk while glancing down at Phil.

“Guess what?” he breathed, catching his breath from the minimal amount of exercise he had just done.

Phil took his headphones off of his ears and hung them around his neck to give Dan his undivided attention. “You just did your annual amount of exercise?” Phil quipped, a smirk appearing on his face.

Dan rolled his eyes fondly, but couldn’t wipe the smile off of his face. “No, you dingus. Laura just called. She’s in labor and she’s on her way to the hospital.”

Phil’s eyes grew wide in shock and his mouth formed into a smile that matched Dan’s. “What? Really?”

“Yeah. She said it could take a couple of hours before there’s any real progress, though. But I still think we should get there soon to support her. Finish up what you’re doing. I’ll make sure we have everything and load it in the car."

“I’m so excited!” Phil exclaimed while doing a little dance in his chair. Dan laughed and knew that if he had tried to do that, he would have certainly fallen out of the chair.

“Me too,” Dan continued to smile. "Come find me when you’re finished with whatever you’re doing.”

Phil nodded, even though he knew there was no way he was going to be able to focus enough to finish editing this scene knowing that his son was going to be born at some point during the day. All he wanted to do was imagine how much his life was going to change in just a few hours. He watched as Dan left the room, and he attempted to finish the section of the video he was working on.

Once Dan walked back upstairs, he headed into the bedroom to grab two backpacks that they had packed a couple of weeks ago in preparation for this day. The first held their own clothes since it was likely they would need to stay overnight at the hospital to ensure everything was okay with both their son and with Laura. The second bag held things for their son. Bottles, blankets, diapers… but the thing Dan was most excited for were the newborn clothes. It was amazing that their son was going to be small enough to fit in them. He and Phil had a difficult time deciding what outfits to bring along; they had purchased quite a few that were downright adorable. But, they ended up choosing one outfit each. Dan chose, of course, an outfit that had a bear pattern and came with a ridiculously adorable bear hat, ears and all, and matching bear pants. Phil, joking that he didn’t want to humiliate his child on his first day of life, chose a onesie that had a small star pattern with gray pants and a gray hat.

As Dan was about to walk out of the room, a glimmer of something caught his eye on the dresser— the silver of his and Phil’s wedding bands. It was quite funny that they even had them, if he was honest. The only places they were able to wear them were in their own home and when they visited their parents. Otherwise, they remained unworn due to the fear that someone would see them and then leak it all over the internet. He knew their situation was odd. It was one thing to hide a relationship from people, but hiding a marriage was almost unheard of. But up until recently, Dan wasn’t ready to confess to the world that he was undoubtedly in love with Phil. It wasn’t that he was ashamed of him, not at all. All of their viewers knew how infatuated Dan was with Phil, platonic or not. Dan just couldn’t get over his past.

A couple of years ago, he refused to even entertain the idea of making his and Phil’s relationship public. All throughout school he was bullied for who he was. When he started a YouTube channel, that bullying continued. While it wasn’t physical or to his face when it was on the internet, it was still directed towards him and it still hurt. Dan didn’t have much control over people and their comments, but what he did have control over is what people saw. With a lot of his life already public and online, he wanted to keep at least one thing between him and Phil. But now, he was tired of being afraid, and he wanted to be able to live a normal life without the fear of people saying mean things towards him. 

Once Dan brought their backpacks out to the car and checked for the fifth time that the car seat was properly installed, he returned inside. He was about to pass by the nursery on his way to see if Phil was almost ready to leave, when he stopped and instead leaned against the doorway and admired everything they had prepared. He and Phil had discussed how to decorate the nursery for quite some time, almost exhausting the selection of images on Pinterest, when they finally decided on a forest theme. They didn’t want to go overboard like a lot of the photos they saw and paint murals on the wall and have life sized stuffed deer and bears. Instead, they opted for a minimalistic approach with soft colors.

There was a white crib along one wall which had gray sheets patterned with white pine trees. On top of the sheets sat a cream colored plush bunny with floppy ears which Phil claimed was the softest thing he's ever felt in his entire life and he just had to get it for him. Hung along the frame of the crib was a small quilt kindly gifted to them from Bryony, who included fabrics with deer, foxes, trees, and bears. Dan thought it was the cutest thing and secretly wanted one for himself in a larger size. Above the crib hung a mobile with a crescent moon and stars. Around the rest of the room there was a white dresser and a ridiculously comfortable arm chair with watercolor prints of different animals and shelves with children’s books hanging on the walls.

Dan could hear Phil walking up to him, but he continued to gaze dreamily into the room. Phil wrapped his arms around Dan’s waist from behind and rested his chin on Dan’s shoulder. 

“It’s insane to think that the next time we’re back home, there will be three of us,” Dan thought aloud. 

Phil placed a quick kiss to Dan’s temple to help quell any nerves that he had. “I know. Are you scared?”

“Scared, and anxious, and excited, and everything all at once.” Dan turned around in Phil’s arms so they were face to face and placed his arms loosely around Phil, as well. “Are you scared?"

Phil shrugged slightly. “A little. Being completely in charge of another human is a scary prospect. But, I’m also excited because it’s a new adventure for us."

“Yeah,” Dan sighed happily.

They stood there for a while staring into the room. This was the last time it was just going to be the two of them. They still couldn’t believe that this was finally happening. It wouldn’t be long before they heard the sounds of crying, little coos and laughs, and little feet padding throughout the house. It was going to be great, and they couldn’t wait.

"Should we get going then?”

 

 

A couple of hours later in the hospital room, cries from a newborn broke the heavy anticipatory silence. Dan and Phil looked at each other, eyes wide and mouths agape, and then quickly turned their attention to the doctor who was holding their son. _Their son._ They were officially parents.

Phil held him first. The doctor swaddled him in a blanket and carefully handed him to Phil. He could already feel tears welling up in his eyes as he was placed in his arms. He felt so delicate and Phil made a vow at that moment to never let anything hurt him for as long as he lived. 

“Hello. Welcome to the world, little guy,” Phil said quietly as he admired the new addition to what was now his family. 

He was biologically Dan’s, and Phil could see the resemblance based on the many baby photos Dan’s mother had shown him. He had a round face, a small button nose, and the tiniest bit of light brown hair on his head— he was perfect.

A few years ago, Phil wasn’t sure if he wanted kids. But when he saw how passionate Dan was about becoming a father one day, he had changed his mind. He realized that being a parent wouldn’t be so bad if he had Dan by his side. Now, Phil wasn’t sure why he had ever thought that he didn’t want kids in the first place. 

Dan watched as Phil held their son— that was his husband, with their child, and Dan couldn’t believe it. They were a family now, and it all felt so unreal. He felt like any moment now, he was going to wake up from this impeccably perfect dream and be pushed back into his boring, monotonous existence. But no, this was real. 

As Phil held their son, his tiny hand was peeking out from the blanket. Softly, Phil reached down to place his hand back under the blanket where it would stay warm, but instead, when Phil’s hand touched his son’s, his small fingers reached out and wrapped around Phil’s index finger. He had never seen nor experienced anything as sweet and innocent as that. Phil could feel a couple of warm tears gliding down his cheeks as his son continued to hold on. He wanted to say something, but the lump that was forming in his throat told him not to. He looked over at Dan who was crying now, as well. 

“He’s so precious,” Dan whispered as he wiped his eyes and turned towards Laura. “Thank you for doing this for us.” He was so incredibly grateful that she was willing to go through nine longs months of pregnancy, as well as birth, in order to provide them, two people she didn’t know before this process began, with a child.

“Yes, thank you,” Phil agreed as tears still glistened in his eyes. 

“Of course. You two know this is why I do this. It makes me incredibly happy that I was able to help you guys start a family,” she smiled.

Gently, Phil handed their son to Dan. Their son fussed a bit once he realized he wasn’t being held close to someone, but once Dan supported him in his arms and held him close to his chest, the fussing ceased. As Dan looked down at him, he could feel a smile spread across his face that he was sure reached his eyes. He didn’t think he could have been happier in that moment. He had wanted to become a dad ever since he could remember, so this was honestly a dream come true. 

“Hello,” Dan said softly. “Could you be any more perfect?"

Both Dan and Phil fondly admired their son and took turns holding him before Laura broke the silence.

“Do you two have a name picked out?” she smiled, sweetly watching the two of them.

Dan and Phil smiled at each other. Phil had come up with the name while the two of them were lying in bed one night. He had gone through the alphabet in his head and was trying to think of names for each letter. When he reached ‘O’, one name in particular stuck out. Although he knew Dan was close to being asleep, he said the name out loud anyway, causing Dan to flinch at the unexpected noise. Dan turned towards Phil, smiled and nodded, before whispering ’that’s it’ and leaned up to kiss him on the cheek. 

“Oliver. Oliver James Howell-Lester,” Phil announced, the same way he had the night it had first came to him.

“Aw, that’s lovely,” she cooed. 

 

 

Oliver was now a week old, and despite the sleepless nights and constant visits from friends and family, Dan and Phil couldn’t have been happier. They loved Oliver with every fiber of their beings, and it was difficult to imagine what life was like without him. 

It was a quiet night in the Howell-Lester household until Dan and Phil were both awoken in the middle of the night by cries coming from the baby monitor. Phil was about to push the duvet off of himself in order to get up and tend to Oliver, when Dan placed his hand on Phil’s arm causing him to pause. 

“I’ve got him,” Dan mumbled while getting up. He knew that Phil had just fed Oliver about two hours ago, and it was his turn to rest. “Go back to sleep.”

Phil settled back into bed as Dan walked out of the room. He was thankful that they had an unspoken rule about alternating who takes care of Oliver during the night. It allowed for both of them to get at least a semi-adequate amount of sleep each night. Although, if sleep wasn’t necessary, Phil believed that he would volunteer to take care of him all the time. He couldn’t get enough of the little guy. Unfortunately, sleep was needed, unless Phil wanted to be a complete monster in the morning. 

About twenty minutes had passed, and Phil realized that Dan hadn’t returned to bed. There was no sound coming from the baby monitor, which probably meant that Dan had fallen asleep in the chair in the nursery. Phil desperately needed to sleep, but he knew it would be difficult to fall back asleep if Dan wasn’t in bed beside him. He threw the covers to the side and began making his way to Oliver’s room, tripping over Dan’s discarded clothes on the floor in the process. 

Once he arrived at Oliver’s room, somehow avoiding bumping into any walls in his half asleep state, he noticed that Dan was still awake, as he was slowly pacing around the room while rocking Oliver back to sleep. 

Phil stood there and admired his two favorite people in the entire universe. Though, he paid extra attention to Dan. This was the happiest he had ever seen him. Sure, Dan was extremely happy when they got married, but this was on another level. Even though the room was dark, Phil could tell that his eyes held a vibrancy that he hadn’t seen in ages and his dimples were taking almost a permanent residency on his face these days. It made Phil even happier that Dan was truly happy.

While Phil watched Dan with Oliver, he couldn’t help but wonder what would happen once they told the world the two things that they had been hiding for the past couple of years. While most of their fans had speculated that the two of them were together, very few had guessed that they had already been married for some time, and almost no one, apart from family and close friends, knew that they now had a son. They were definitely going to drop a bombshell at some point and the internet was sure to go crazy. But, they were tired of hiding. With Oliver now in their lives, they didn’t want to have to keep him a secret. They were so ecstatic that they wanted to show him off to the entire world, even if it meant coming clean about the last eight years of their relationship. 

After a couple of minutes, Dan was still unaware that Phil was standing by the door. Phil quietly walked into the room and stood next to Dan, who continued to sway side to side with Oliver in his arms. Now that he was close enough, Phil could hear Dan humming softly. He didn’t recognize the song— it was probably something obscure that Dan had on a Spotify playlist— but it was a soft melody that Oliver apparently enjoyed if his fluttering eyes were anything to go by. Phil’s heart swelled at the scene. He didn’t think it was possible to love Dan any more than the day they got married, but he was wrong. 

Oliver eventually closed his eyes and Dan took that as a cue to place him back in his crib.

“We’re going to break the internet, aren’t we?” Phil asked quietly as the two of them looked over their son with their hands resting along the edge of the crib. 

“Yup. But, that’s okay because I’ve always wanted to be Kim Kardashian,” Dan joked, attempting to make light of the topic that truly terrified him. “I don’t want to worry about that now though. I just want to enjoy this for the time being."

Phil nodded and moved his hand slightly so that it was resting on top of Dan’s as he gently caressed Dan's hand with his thumb. He knew Dan was anxious about revealing everything to the internet, and Phil couldn’t blame him. It was scary. Although they knew that a large portion of their fans already thought they were together, they also knew that backlash was inevitable. Phil was expecting that the majority of the feedback would be positive, but even if it wasn’t, Dan and Phil still had each other, and at the end of the day, that’s all that mattered.

“I love you,” Phil whispered. He removed his hand from on top of Dan’s and instead brought his arm around Dan’s waist. In return, Dan lifted his arm and wrapped it around Phil, rubbing his hand up and down Phil’s upper arm. 

“I love you too,” Dan replied as he kissed the side of Phil’s head. "And you know what?” he asked, turning towards Phil now.

“Hmm?” Phil hummed, turning to face Dan. He could feel his eyes becoming heavy from the lack of sleep, but he refused to go to bed until Dan did. 

Dan grabbed both of Phil’s hands before he gave him a quick peck on his lips and rested his forehead against Phil’s before speaking. 

“This is the most fun I’ve ever had."


End file.
